The Scratching Post: Catman Has Nothing To Say

It's been brought to my attention recently that many of our dedicated readers would like to see more scratching posts. Well, I'll tell you what. Go F yourselves. It's not easy to think of things to say, and it's even more difficult to think of funny things to say. We can't all be J, the delicate genius, getting into work at 5am so that he can walk around feeling like he is so great.

No. For a Catman, it's hard work. This morning, as I sat and listened to LL tell me about how I am lame now (see: Catman Poll), I pondered over the following question: you always hear about "impair" and "impeach," but why the hell don't you ever hear about "imapple" or "imbanana?" I thought this would make for a great scratching post, but J didn't hesitate to knock that dream out of the dreamtree. Well, I put it up anyway, J. How you like me now?